Anti-America’s Top Ten Countdown: January 12, 2025 Edition

Yes, I’m doing this again. I’m going to count down the top ten most important news stories of the past week for progressives. I’m going to choose them, not the obedient idiots at MSNBC or CNN, and certainly not the conservative hacks at Fox News. So let’s get into them, shall we?

Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announces his resignation. Image taken from CNN.

10: THAT’S TRUE…D’OH!

Justin Trudeau, the Prime Minister of Canada and leader of the country’s Liberal party, has announced his resignation. I’m not in Canada, even if I might wish I lived there, but from what I’ve gathered he overstayed his welcome. Additionally, he loosened Canada’s immigration laws, which some blamed for increased housing costs. In my mind, Trudeau gets too much hate, but then again, he looks like an angel compared to the abomination who’s about to be President on the other side of the border. This resignation sets off an election in Canada, and some people are comparing Pierre Poilievre, the leader of the Conservative Party, to Donald Trump. Now, if I lived in Canada, I wouldn’t vote for the Conservatives, but they’re nothing like the Republican Party. They still support universal health insurance and gun control, for instance, and don’t deny climate change. In many ways, they are to the left of the American Democratic Party. Countdown number nine.

Thumbnail for the Matt Gaetz show on One America News.

9: SHUT THE GAETZ

So let’s talk about Matt Gaetz for a moment. You might remember him as the former Congressman and sex trafficker from northwest Florida. Trump nominated him to be the U.S. Attorney General, but in the words of Gaetz’s Cameo page, that didn’t work out., that’s putting it pretty mildly, don’t you think? And yes, he’s on Cameo now, just like so many other washed-up conservative figures. He may have evaded any legal consequences for his actions, just like the President-elect, but at least we get to make fun of him. Gaetz now has a show on One America News Network, and he’s got so much Botox it’s ridiculous. But he isn’t going to be Attorney General, even if the actual Attorney General, Pam Bondi, isn’t going to be much better. Even so, the pathetic man who is Matt Gaetz is now on track for a humiliating next chapter in his career, and it couldn’t be more satisfying. Countdown number eight.

Courtroom sketch of Donald Trump’s hush money sentencing. Image taken from Reuters.

8: GETTING AWAY WITH MURDER

After the Supreme Court ruled that Trump could in fact be sentenced (on a 5-4 decision, mind you), the President-elect was indeed sentenced by Judge Juan Merchan in the hush money case. His penalty was what’s known as an “unconditional discharge” - in other words, absolutely nothing. Sure, he’s technically still a felon and cannot own a gun (not that people should be able to own guns anyway, though that’s a rant for another day), but he can still be President. Man, I wish Merchan had possessed the spine to put Trump in prison, because such crimes usually do result in prison time if the defendant is convicted. So that begs the question: Why do we even have laws? Like, if Trump the convicted felon can be President, nobody should be in jail. I hope that the first time he travels abroad as President, he gets arrested. What a disgrace. Countdown number seven.

Mark Zuckerberg announces content moderation policy changes at Meta. Image taken from Tech Policy Press.

7: FACTS? WHO CARES ABOUT THOSE?

Ah, Mark Zuckerberg. Other than Rudy Giuliani, there is perhaps no public figure who’s experienced more of a fall from grace over the last decade or so. I’m old enough to remember this article from 2017 arguing that Zuckerberg should run for President in 2020. From the vantage point of 2025, it’s downright laughable to think he’d have run against Trump as a Democrat. And yet, somebody actually published it. In any case, Zuckerberg, whose company Meta owns FaceBook and Instagram, has said that Facebook will end fact-checking on its platform. I believe this is an effort to move these platforms in the direction of Elon Musk’s Xitter (pronounced “shitter) in a craven display of anticipatory obedience to the Trump regime. Unlike Elon Musk, who has his devoted followers, nobody likes Zuckerberg anymore, and that’s a stark contrast from when he was a hero of the #Resistance in 2017! Countdown number six!

Xitter profile picture of Phillip “Catturd” Buchanan.

6: GET THE LITTER BOX

In the words of The Ring of Fire host Farron Cousins, this is one of the dumbest stories I’ve ever covered. But it’s true. For those of who who have remained blissfully unaware, there’s a right-wing influencer on Xitter who goes by the name of “Catturd”, using toilet humor in order to be a pro-Trump troll. What makes this even more pathetic is that he’s apparently 60 years old according to Wikipedia. Anyway, Phillip “Catturd” Buchanan has filed a defamation lawsuit against Congressman Thomas Massie (R-KY) of Christmas card fame. Catturd called Massie a “cringe butthurt DeSimp loser” after Massie jokingly asked the influencer how the kitty litter tasted. I don’t know what all of this means, or if anything will come of it at all. What I do know is that this makes a mockery of the United States…well, more so. We are a global laughing stock. Indeed, we’re worse than a global laughing stock if the top five are anything to go by.

Barack Obama and Donald Trump talking cordially at Jimmy Carter’s funeral. Image taken from NBC News.

5: O-BOMBING IT:

So former President Jimmy Carter recently died at the age of 100. It’s quite tragic that he lived just long enough to see his home state, Georgia, vote for Trump again. At Carter’s funeral, Barack Obama and Donald Trump can be seen embracing one another as if they’re longtime friends. Some people might disagree with me on this, but in my mind, Obama is showing his true colors right here. As a former President and still the de facto leader of the Democratic Party, Obama should be a voice for the party fighting against Trump’s attack on democracy. Instead he’s acting buddy-buddy with the evil man whom Obama’s constantly called a threat to democracy. Well, which is it? If you really believe Trump’s so dangerous, why are you publicly acting like he’s your friend? The Democrats are certainly behaving like the controlled opposition right now, and they are a disgrace. Countdown number four.

Senator John Fetterman (D-PA). Image taken from NBC News.

4: FETTERMAN IS NOT THE BETTER MAN

Remember when I said that Mark Zuckerberg suffered the biggest fall from grace over the last decade? Well, I lied - that “honor” goes to John Fetterman, the “Democratic” Senator from Pennsylvania. Fetterman, who was elected as a progressive Democrat over Republican quack Mehmet Oz, has shown his true colors as a traitor to the cause. Fetterman has announced he will meet with Trump at Mar-A-Lago. Truth be told, there’s no excuse for this. Literally none. Fetterman ran for office promising to counteract the no votes of Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema, and now he’s becoming one of them himself. Unlike Manchin or Sinema, however, Fetterman ran as a progressive, which makes me think his 2022 stroke might have broken his brain, literally. Brain damage can turn one into a completely different person, and that’s quite sad really. Countdown number three.

An image Donald Trump posted on Truth Social implying a desire to invade Canada. Image taken from the Council of Canadians website.

3: CANADA GOOSE CHASE

I want to make one thing very clear: I oppose the potential invasion of Canada. I hope it doesn’t happen, but Trump, who is about to have near-absolute power over the military, is openly saying that he’ll make Canada the 51st state. He’s been talking about it constantly for the last few weeks, and CNN is disgracefully covering it as a “territorial expansion” rather than the “military invasion” that such a project would entail. But let’s be real: Trump admires Putin and wants to be just like him. I think we should take these threats seriously, which is why it’s beyond infuriating that Democrats don’t seem to be. I emailed my Senators, both Democrats, to ask them to make a statement opposing this invasion, because even those who think the idea is ridiculous don’t seem to understand how horrific it would be. We won’t be a laughing stock anymore - the world will be united against us, and we will be a global pariah. If anything, the American population is worse than the Russian population, because Russian civilians couldn’t vote against Putin. The American people freely chose Trump, and we do not deserve to be forgiven. Countdown number two.

Firefighters battling the Pacific Palisades wildfire.

2: THE BLAZE

As I write this, the city of Los Angeles, second-largest in America, is dealing with a series of horrendous wildfires. Possibly the most horrific one is currently taking place in Pacific Palisades, an affluent neighborhood with many famous residents. It’s true that many online are not sympathetic to wealthy celebrities losing their second (or seventh) homes, and I understand why. However, I think it’s worth comparing these fires to the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting in 2012. It’s been said before, but Sandy Hook was the end of the gun control debate; if you were going to write a story about an event that would make Americans support gun control, you couldn’t do much “better” than 20 first-graders gunned down in their classroom right before Christmas. In much the same way, if a beautiful wealthy urban neighborhood was destroyed by a wildfire, and nothing is done about climate change, then nothing will ever be done. If the 2024 election ended the fight against climate change in the United States, the Pacific Palisades wildfire put the final nail in its coffin and buried it six feet under. Countdown number one.

Outgoing Vice President Kamala Harris shaking hands with Speaker of the House Mike Johnson. Image taken from ABC News.

1: AMERICA’S GONE COUP-COUP:

January 6, 2025 was not like January 6, 2021. This time, the certification went on with little fuss, and no Democrats objected to it. This means that the insurrection worked. Donald Trump got away with a literal coup attempt, and now we can say it wasn’t even an attempt. This is America now, where bad behavior gets rewarded. Unarmed black men have to be careful not to be caught slippin’ up, whereas the President of the United States can make his supporters storm the Capitol and get nothing for it. Indeed, he’ll get rewarded for it with the highest office in the land once again. This country is not worth saving - at least Brazil punishes their insurrectionist leaders. That is a sickening end to our countdown, isn’t it?